Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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