He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
