she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Randomize
