If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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