Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize