I wish i was in the wii world.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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