porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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