How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
