All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
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