So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
