I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
