Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I would fuck him just for his dog
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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