so that wasnt chicken after all
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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