Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Randomize