it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
