yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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