hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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