Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
