Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
