I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
