i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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