Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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