idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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