The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
