i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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