I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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