just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Pappa wants mamma naked
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize