oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize