yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
