I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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