dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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