Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
