I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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