I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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