you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
