I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
