I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
