dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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