There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize