sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I think I sprained my soul last night
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
