I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
This is not my ceiling
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
