handjob tips. give me some.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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