My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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