omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
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