Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(581): View more from Quebec

I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.

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(581): I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset. http://tfl.nu/8lj9

Replies (33) Good night (1435) Bad night (5764)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers

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(610): she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers http://tfl.nu/sjqg

Replies (14) Good night (952) Bad night (4359)
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(507): View more from Minnesota

Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.

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(507): Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss. http://tfl.nu/1ntp

Replies (10) Good night (5370) Bad night (945)
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(705): View more from Ontario

I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?

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(705): I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan? http://tfl.nu/r3wz

Replies (5) Good night (1261) Bad night (1924)
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(804): View more from Virginia

I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.

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(804): I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast. http://tfl.nu/dcvd

Replies (26) Good night (1739) Bad night (3444)
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(260): View more from Indiana

ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.

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(260): ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me. http://tfl.nu/9s81

Replies (4) Good night (1312) Bad night (905)
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(714): View more from California

So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.

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(714): So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions. http://tfl.nu/jiu6

Replies (5) Good night (1890) Bad night (505)
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(778): View more from British Columbia

DOWN HORMONES. BACK.

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(778): DOWN HORMONES. BACK. http://tfl.nu/nnqc

Replies (4) Good night (1510) Bad night (570)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.

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(401): You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous. http://tfl.nu/cb7r

Replies (4) Good night (1364) Bad night (575)
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(587): View more from Alberta

It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.

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(587): It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse. http://tfl.nu/f8ym

Replies (3) Good night (1216) Bad night (505)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.

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(304): 1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills. http://tfl.nu/lzae

Replies (10) Good night (1514) Bad night (622)
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(706): View more from Georgia

Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...

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(706): Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something... http://tfl.nu/hryz

Replies (4) Good night (534) Bad night (795)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.

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(908): I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game. http://tfl.nu/k79m

Replies (3) Good night (562) Bad night (398)
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(940): View more from Texas

Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.

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(940): Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them. http://tfl.nu/2war

Replies (13) Good night (647) Bad night (1202)
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(708): View more from Illinois

You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.

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(708): You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat. http://tfl.nu/s6dc

Replies (1) Good night (441) Bad night (558)

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