i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
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