dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
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I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
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This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
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