so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
