I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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