he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
