My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Randomize